


The Babies Are 2

by vriskastrider



Series: The Babies Are Us Trilogy [2]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, Frozen (2013), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Homestuck, Pirates of the Caribbean (Movies), Star Wars - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Apocalypse, BDSM, F/F, F/M, Horcrux Hunting, Incest, M/M, Mad Science, Multi, Murder, Nuclear Warfare, Nuclear Weapons, Original Mythology, Politics, Revolution, Romance, Science Fiction, Sibling Incest, War
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-17
Updated: 2016-09-20
Packaged: 2018-08-15 13:58:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 8
Words: 16,659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8059027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vriskastrider/pseuds/vriskastrider
Summary: elsa and anna are prisoners of darth vader and forced to give birth to nuclear weapons that threaten the entire world. meanwhile, gunilla the NEW queen of ardelia has to deal with bigfoots, long words and killing harry potter and voldemort. and theres batman. darth vader and gunilla are also pregnent, who will they give birth to???





	1. CHAPTER 1: AGGRESSIVELY PREGNENT WITH NUCLEAR WARHEADS

CHAPTER 1: AGGRESSIVELY PREGNENT WITH NUCLEAR WARHEADS

(hi this is sequel to my fic the babies are us!!!! pls read it)

(also CONTENT WARNING CONTAINS VIOLENs AND SEX!!!)

gunilla was the queen of ardelia witch you already knew if you read the last fic. and if u didnt then what the hell are you doing here reading this SEQUAL??? 1th i probably wont even expalin waht the hell all these ppl and events are so youll be like CONFUSED AS HELL... 2th youll also get spoilered as fuck!! SO GO READ THE GOD DAMN STORY CALLED "THE BABIES ARE US!!!" and if you already did then sorry for wasting ur time with this horse shot

anyway gunilla was the queen of ardelia. you know who she is. the girl with HUGE BOOBS (radius almost 0.6m) and who is a queen, because elsa and anna disappeared. and i guess she shaved the kingdom from evil killer sex robots?? thats a good reason to get elected queen imo

but the point is: gunilla, the queen, was sitting at the meeting of GLOBAL UNION witch is you know a thing where multiple countries discuss their feelings and stuff. but not literally countries. countries cant talk and they dont even have feelings so its the queens and presidents and dictators etc who talk! and gunilla WAS the queen, so she was CORRECT AS FUCK in being there in the first place.

the room was big. duhh?? i think theres like 50 countries irl, and ARDEALIA DOESNT EVEN EXIST. so in this realm of fantasy THERE AR EMORE COUNTRIES and there fore places where the main dudes of countries meet up and discuss their feelings are p much HUGE AS FUCK (area almost 1000m2). and there was a big screen witch showed like the STAELITE IMAGE of the WHOLE WORLD. it looked COOL AS HELL, but was probably p much useless. i mean why not just use a god damn normal map??? if the thing shows like a big portion of the planet then you can see NO DETAILS AT ALL.

and like i said there were lots of ppl who lead countries. there was DARH VADER the EMPEROR OF STARLAND (witch is a country next to ardelia). gunilla decided to go to talk to DARTH VADER because she is a repsinsobile queen who ACTUALLY CARES WHAT HAPPENS IN HER COUNTRY AND BY EXTESIION I GUESS COUNTRIES THAT ARE NEAR HER COuNTRY BECaUESE WHAT HAPPENS IN COUNTRIES NEAR YOU TENDS TO KiND OF AFFECT WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU. so gunilla went and talked to darth wader.

DARH VADER was dressed in all black. like a goth. but he wasnt hot and his boobs were p much nonexistant. also he had a helmet witch was out of fashion. and also he had a COOL AS FUCK LAZER SWORD witch i guess gives him SOME fashion bonus points.

"hi" gunilla said. "what r we going to discuss today even??" uhh gunilla your the god damn QUEEN maybe u should know what happens in meetings of the GLOBAL UNION??

"something EXTREMLY Interesting" darth vader said and breathed OMINIOUSLY AS HELL. did i mention breathing? because DARTH VADERs things is BREATHING CREEPILY AS FUCk. nobody knows why. some say he was in an axident and some say hes just VERY out of shape.

but anyway gunilla didnt have more time to talk with DARk VADER because PRINCESS ESTRELLA THE QUEEN OF SWEDEN called her. gunilla said ok see u later and went to talk to PRINCESS ESTREALLA THE QUEEN OF SWEDEN who was much better person than darth vader. and had bigger boobs. and those 2 things are p much the same imo

"hey hows ur baby coming along" PRINCESS ESTRELLA THE QUEEN OF SWEDEN axed gunilla.

"its fine" said gunilla. "i have some minor pains but im not sure why."

"maybe you should axe your husband DR HOUSE why its that way" PRINCESS ESTREALLA THE QUEEN OF SWEDEN suggested.

"i think its just normal to feel pain when ur having a baby come out of u" gunilla shrugged. "i mean unless its a magic teleporting baby that sudenly just teleportes the fuck out of ur tummy but thats just the STUPIDEST THING I HAVE EVER HEARD."

"i agree lets go the meeting is about to start!!" PRINCESS ESTRELLA THE QUEEN OF SWEDEN noticed. and they ran to their places. there was a COOL AS FUCK golden sing that said ARDELIA where gunilla sitted. it was COOL AS HELL. maybe i should order some golden signs for my royal meetings gunilla wondered silently.

and then they began talking. about some boring things i guess. like some countries were at war, and p much non stop SHOOTING THE FUCK out of each other. but gunilla didnt care because it had been v peaceful since the twin incest lesbien queens diapeared. during elsas and annas reign the whole country was p much at CONSTANT THREAT OF NUCLEAR ATTACKS but that couldnt hapen now!! gunilla thought im p much the BEST AT DIPLOMACY. if diplomacy means not getting your country EXPLODED THE FUCK OUT OF by some nuclear weapons.

DONOLD TRUMP the KING OF AMERICA banged the fuck out of his gavel witch was a freudian symbol for his daugter and interrupted the kings of wizardland and norway, who were punching each other, i guess because their countries were at war. but honestly that doesnt even do anything... i mean whats the best case scenario here dudes??? you punch the other king SO HARD that he fucking dies and then your country wins the war?? think again, dump ass because THEYLL JUST ELECT ANOTHER KING??

but i mean the point here is that DONLAND TRUMP said: "STOP PUNCHING THE SHIT OUT OF EACH OTER YO FOOLS!!! LETS CONTINUE DISCUSSING BUILDING WALLS EVERY WHERE!!!"

but then SOME BODY FUCKING SHOT DONALD TRUMP IN THE FUCKING HEAD!!! EVERY ONE GASPED AND WAS OVER ALL SURPRISED AS HELL!!!!! WHO COULD IT HAVE BEEN??

"its me" said DARTH VADER the lord of starland. "i killed donaldn trump" he said and pointed a gun at everybody present "and i will kill the rest of you unless you all STOP THIS HORSE SHIT AND LET ME TALK"

even the kings of wizardland and norway stopped their honestly TOTALLY UNECESARY battle.

DARTH vADER walked to the place where DONALND TRUMPS BODY was and kicked his orange corpse away.

"NOW" DARTH BADER SAID "we can start discussing something REALLY IMPORTANT."

everybody was quiet. witch was a good thing since other wise DARTH VADER would probably have just killed them all.

"heres the thing" LORD DARTH VADER said. "you are going to WITH OUT RESISTANCE give me COMPLETE CONTROL OF THE KING DOM OF ARDELIA-"

gunilla gasped.

"- OR I WILL FUCKING END YOU ALL YOU MISREABLE PIECES OF SHIT WITH NUCLEAR WARHEADS!!"

"lol u wouldnt really" said HARRY POTTER the KING OF WIZARDLAND. "lol the whole point of nucluar weapons is that u dont use them u fucking idiot"

"FINE if You DON NOT BELIEVE ME" said DARTH VADER "THEN I SHALL DEMOSTRATE!!"

every body just laughed because what HARRY PITTER THE KING OF WIZARDLAND just said was p much the truth.

DARTH VADER pressed a red button that was next to him. nothing happened... and then nothing happened... and then nothing almost happened but what instead happened was that in the big screen THE WHOLE COUNTRY OF SWEDEN JUST EXPLODED.

PIRNCESS ESTREALLA THE QUEEN OF SWEDEN began to cry because she had just become just ESTRELLA. you p much cant be a queen if your whole country BLOWS THE FUCK UP.

"you" said DARTH VADER and pointed at gunilla "shall make me the sole ruler of ardelia in SEVEN DAYS or else... wait fuck i just showed you what im going to do to everybody so SEE YOU LATER NOOBS"

suddenly THE WALL EXPLODED AND EVERYONE SCREAMED as a HUGE FUCKING CAR BURSTED INTO THE ROOM. it was a red car with flame markings witch is universal code for "FAST AS FUCK". DARTH VADER jumped into the car and rode away.

every one was p much v shocked. except estrella who was crying. gunilla ran to her and began to kiss her pasionately because she was good at diplomacy.

"HEY GUnilla" harry potter screamed.  
"CANT YOU SEE IM KIND OF BYSY??" gunila screamed and tore her cloths off. and also estrellas cloths off.

"i just wanted to tell" hary potter said "that unless you do what DARTH VADER KING O STARLAND does i will also promise to NUCLEAR BOMB the FUCK out of your sorry ass."

"that wont do shit because DARTH VADER would already had destroyed the whole world" gunilla said annoyedly and began sexxing estrella because she was very good at diplomacy. she inserted her vag into estrellas mouth and began shaking sexily and passionateily.

and mean while everybody left expect those who were too distracted by HOT LESBIEN SEX. but after some time they left too.

after gunilla and estrealla finished sexxing both of them began to cry.

"fuck fuck FUCKS HSIT GOD DAMN" gunilla sweared and cried. "I DONT WANT TO GIVE MY COUNTRY TO DARTH VADER WHAT THE HELL CAN I DO??"

estrella didnt answer she just cried some more.

"come" gunila said suddenl.y  
"huh i already did" estrella sniffed confusedly.  
"not in that way GOD" gunilla said angrily. "lets go to ardelia i must do something!!"

and they ran away.

\---

SOME TIME BEFORE THE PRECEEDING EVENTS TOOK PLACE...

DARTH VADER was sitting on his EVIL THRONE. before the GLOBAL UNION meeting you know. the one u just read about?

suddenly his ROYAL EVIL SCIENTIST who was DR CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW came.

"what can i do for you today my lord" DR CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW axed. "shall i prepare a pirate boat for your GLOBAL UNION meeting today?"

"no i think a car will be fine" darth vader said "because THE MEETING IS ON LAND YOU FUCKING IDIOT. prepare my best car"

"k" said DR CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW.

"but wait theres more" said DARTH VADER. "use your EVIL PIRATE SCIENCE to prepare the first nuclear warhead today"

DR CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW gulped. "that will be dificult my lord but i will try"

"EXCELLANT" said DARH VADER. "show me my wonderful warhead creating machines"

"as you wish my lord" said DR CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW and lead darth vader into some generic evil laboratory. there were uhh evil sciencey things like test tubes with unidentifieable babies insine. and i guess... shark pits?? and lava?? wait, LAVA SHARK PITS thats COOL AS HELL.

and the sharks can also shoot lazers.

but LASER SHOOTING LAVA SHARK PITS was not what LORD DARH VADER wanted to see today. jack lead his king next to a room that had a sign that said: "CONFIDENTAL AS HELL DO NOT ENTER UNLESS YOU ARE DR CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW AND SLASH OR DARTH VADER"

darth vader began to laugh evilly as the door opened because something EVIL AS HELL was about to happen.

and inside the room there were TWO TABLES and on them were tied... ELSA AND ANNA!!

"HAHAHAHAAHAHAHHHSHAGHAHHAHAHHHHAHHAAHAHAHAHHHAHHAAHHAHAAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHH" DARTH VADER LAUGHED. "now, my beautiful lesbien birthers... YOU SHALL... GIVE BIRTH... TO NUCLEAR WARHEADS!!!"

dr capt JACK SPARROW pressed a red button.

elsa and anna screamed in pain... as HUGE NUCLREAR WARHEADS BURSTED OUT OF THEIR VAGS.

NEXT CHAPTER: HOW ARE ELSA AND ANNA ALIVE?? WHAT WILL GUNILLA DO?? AND WHO IS GUNILLAS BABY?? AND WILL THE WORLD BE DESTROYED??


	2. CHAPTER 2: DARTH VADER PREGNENT???

CHAPTER 2: DARTH VADER PREGNENT???

when gunilla and PRINCESS ESTRELLA THE FORMER QUEEN OF SWEDEN returned to ardelia they immediately called a ROYAL COUNCIL MEETING OF ARDELIA into existance. mean while the whole fucking world was kind of epxloding into panic and stuff since darth vader had threatened to nuke the entire world.

"whare the hell are the ROYAL MINISTERS OF ARDEALIA" angered gunilla. time travel is canon sooo they dont really have an exceuse. i mean being late is kind of im possible i u can time travel??? JUST TIME TARVEL TO THE PAST DUMb ASS

"my endeared queen i have disembarked at the most stupendous concievable precipitancy" said ROSE LALANDE the new head wizard because dumledore the old head wizard had disappeared. and uhhh i guess shes an IMIGRANT or some thing because more wizords during the last story would kind of have changed some thigns so DUNNO.

"the very same whereabouts additionally applies to me" said KANYA MARYAM the MINISTER OF FASHION. whose job was to make sure fashion was ok in the kingdom.

"IM GETTING OLDER EVERY DAY AND HAVE TO WALK WITH A CANE" screamed dr house the MINISTER OF MEDICINE. "FUCK MY LIFE SHIT ASSSSS"

"calm down" said gunilla "i was maybe just worried THAT THE FUCKING WORLD WAS GOING TO END YOU KNOW???"

estrella was still crying in the corner. i guess having ur whole country sudenly blow up kind of creates emotions.

"but now since ur all here lets decide what the hell to do" said gunilla. "ok option 1. surender and handle ardelia over to DARTH VADER. not gonna happen any other ideaS???"

"FUCKING KILL THEM WITH WEAPANS" shouted dr house. "WAR!!!"

"good idea" said gunilla. "uhh who are our allies again. i mean swedens totally blown the fuck up.... uhh..... wizardland?? rose how r our relations with wizardland"

"the king of wizardland whom is apellated harry potter happens to anathematize us due to an indecorous memorandum sent by you, encompassing the locution 'SUCK MY WAND (WAND MEANS PENIS)'" said rose lalande.

"oh wait" gunilla said and laughed. "fuck this still was worth it anyways how could we change his mind"

estrella stoped crying and began giggling. "hehe gunilla dont act like u dont know the best thing for international relations"  
"u mean.... HOT SEX???"  
"yeah"

"hmmmmm", gunilla said thoughtfully. "ill get to it. the rest of u can figure out what else to do to get our military prepared as fuck"

and she immediately ran to the ROYAL ARDELIA SEXCOPTER.

"what a humdinger state of affairs, having to chaperone the commonwealth whilst our queen vamooses to undertake royal intercourse", wondered rose lalande.

"indubutably", agreed kanaya. then they kissed passionately and lesbianely, because they got gril boners from long words.

"the whole worlds still fucked i think im gonna return to crying" cried PRINCESS ESTRELLA and returned to crying.

"FUCK CRYING" screamed dr house whose anger had only grown more prominent with age, like the taste of fine wine. "IM GOING TO CALL A ROYAL EXPERT WHO CAN GIVE US AN ARMY OF......."

every one was quitet dramatically.

"BIGFOOTS"

\---

back in starland where darth vader lived, darth vader returned from the meeting of GLOBAL UNION.

"how did the nukes work" he demanded from dr cap jack sparrow. they were sitting in vaders EVIL ROYAL THRONE ROOM, witch was a big room with a big black throne that was built from dead babies.

"fantastically" joyed dr captain jack sparrow. "as the baby legend foretold, they were PRECIES AS FUCK and managed to destroy excactly only sweden and nothing else. i went to check and there was like a BUG FUCKING HOLE that was ENDLEESLLY DEEP it was COOL AS FUCK and KIND OF FRIGHTNING"

"execllent" said DARTH VADER. "if it hadnt been so shooting a fucking nuke just next to the country we want to invade would kind of have been a mistake but luckily it wasnt"

"so whats next" axed dr captn jack sparrow "r we going to double nuke production or do some thing else? i mean ardelias royalty isnt stupid theyre just gonna hand the country over to you"

"if theres one thing i will never doubt" answered lord king darth vader "its the ENDLESS FUCKING STUPIDITY OF EVERY BODY THAT LIVES IN THAT SHIT HOLE COUNTRY. trust me i have FIRST HAND EXPERICNE. but finally i will HAVE MY REVENGE AHAHAAAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAYHHAAHHAHAGAHGAHAH½!!!!!!"

"but... so more nukes???" confirmed dr captn jack sparrow.

"yeah" said darth vader. "and if ardelias royalty is even stupider than i can dream we can just creata a NUCLEAR POWERED ARMY OF BABIES my dear nukebirthers can give us. legends say production rate is at 1000 babbys/min."

"wow" said dr capt jack sparow. "those grils really are the best at birthing the world has seen."

so dr captn jack sparrow went back to the SECRET ROOM where elsa and anna were enslaved and fed them more uranium to make them give birth to more nukes. he was humming casually and thinking about all the sex he was going to have with DARTH VADER.... maybe they would finally get lucky and have a REAL heir to the throne...

suddenly DARTH VADER ran in!!! and was crying!! BUT NOT OF PAIN AND SADNESS,,, BUT OF HAPPINES!!!

"DOCTOR CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW" darth vader cried "IM PREGNANT"

\---

mean while in ardelia dr houses royal advisor had already arrived. he was a man with a moustache.

"hi every body im BARY ANDERSON" said BARTY ANDERSON. "did u know that the yeti can give birbth to 6 babies every minute?? today we are going to"

"SHUT UP BARY" dr house screamed. "i mean. this is my friend BARTY ANDERSON whose FUCKING GOING TO GET US A ROYAL ARMY OF BIGBFOOTS AND YETIS AND ALL THE MYSTICAL CREATURE THINGS."

barty anderson presed a button on his phone and a real fucking creepy music started playing.

"hes a legend who has hosted over 90000000 shows on huntihng yetis" dr house said "but at some point he died and was replaced by a iBARTYDROID who can unfortunately only do his job of hosting tv shows."

"wait what r we going to do today anyway" axed barty aanderson. "oh fuck i forgot wheres the script"

"today is a VERY SPECIAL EPOSIDE" said dr house. "we are going to... FIND ALL OF THE FUCKING BIBGFOOS"

"HOLY SHIT" said barty anderson. "ALL of them?? we better go out fast folks"

"i am incredulous to the consummation of this stratagem" said rose lalande but decided to follow barty anderson and dr house outside anyways.

\---

gunillas ROYAL SEXCOPTER was FAST AS FUCK so it took p much NO TIME for her to get to wizardland. it was a big country with all sorts of wizard castles and other magic things. harry potter lived in HOGWORTS witch was a BIG WIZARD CASTLE (area almost 60000km2).

"hey i was waiting for u" said harry potter when gunillas royal sexcopter landed on the roof of hogworts.

"thats strange" said gunilla suspicously. "how did you even know"

"uhhhhh magic bro??" said harry potter. "anyways, lets go to the royal discussion room."

and they went to the royal discussion room. hogworts had MAGIC STAIRS witch moved around magically and p much uselessly. i mean why not just STAY THERE u god dman stupid stairs?? ppl who cant magic have designed houses in witch all places can be accessed FOR LIKE FOREVER.... its NOT THAT HARD... and also, cause the stairs fucking move all the time, how can you even go anywhere??? do the stairs do whatever u want?? ok but what if u are there with 100 other ppl who want to go to other places?? MAGIC STAIRS FUCKING SUCK AND HERES A WARNING: DONT GO NEAR MAGIC STAIRS.

but gunilla and harry potter WENT NEAR TO MAGIC STAIRS LIKE FUCKING IDITOS because i guess they cant read the narrative.

"this doesnt look like a discussion room" said gunilla because the room didnt look like a discussion room. and that was because it was a jail, witch had bars and everything.

"and that is...." said harry potter dramatically.... "BECASUE IT ISNT"

and HARRY POTTER PUNSHED GUNILLA TO HER FUCKING FACE AND KNOCKED HER THE HELL OUT!!!! H O LYS SHITT!!!!!!

NEXT CHAPTER: WHAT HAPPENS TO GUNILLA??? CAN ARDELIAN DUDES FIND BIGFOOTS??? AND WHO IS DARTH VADERS BABY??


	3. CHAPTER 3: GUNILLAS PRISON ESCAPE

CHAPTER 3: GUNILLAS PRISON ESCAPE

when gunilla woke up she had likea HUGE AS FUCK pain in her head (size almost 6 pain units). it was dark and the wHOLE WORLD WAS SPINNING witch how ever was because of being hit in head. i mean things would be p serious if the WHOLE WORLD was spinning.

and she was in the jail witch is a place for criminals BUT SHE DEFNITELY WASNT ONE SO WTF?? the jail was dark and dirty. and there were bodies of dead criminals next to gunilla but they only had bones and not other things that make living beings work.

"what the FUCK" said gunilla disgustedly.

"heheheheheh" some one laughed evilly and when gunilla looked it was HARRY POTTER THE KING OF WIZARDLAND!!

"GET ME OUT OF HERE" gunilla screamed. "seriouslay im at least 60% sure theres BETTER PLACES TO DO SOME ROYAL DISCUSION IN THAN DIRTY PRISONS"

"no you dumb fuck" harry potter said and stopped laughing. "your my prisoner now dude"  
"WHAT Why the hell??"

"dont you rembeber the letter you sent me?" axed harry potter. "guess what. WIZRARD CULTURES ISNT A JOKE and im NOT going to tolerate some body make fun of wizords. there fore ROT IN JAIL while ur stupid ass country gets nucleared by DARTH VADER."

"so are you with DARTH AVADER you EVIL ASS HOLE" screamed gunilla "you IDIOT dont pretend like hes not going to take over the WHOLE WORLD after geting ardelia!!"

"how would getting to rule a shit country help at all lol" laughed harry potter "and anyways no.... im just here for REVENGE"

and then he laughed more evilly like this "AHAHHAAHAAHHHAAHAHAHAHAAJAAJAHAHAAHHA" and left and slammed the door so hard it almost broke.

and gunilla was left alone in the jail!!! not counting skeletonis. i mean u shouldnt really count skeletons... they arent ppl, sorry skeleton activits. i mean thers like a real DEFININIOTN OF LIFE and it goes like to b alive u must b able to repodusce etc and sorry skeletons but i have never seen skeletons having sex and birthing babyes?? so NO SKELETONS ARENT ALIVE END OF STORY and there fore skeletons arent people. at least there arent gohsts in this narrative so that the queastion WHETHER NOT ALIVE SENTININT THINGS ARE PEOPLE doesnt need to be adressed.

"fuuucccckkkk....." gunilla fucked to her self and rubbed her head. that ass hole harry potter could have used magics to knock her out instead of his fists. dude not cool.

gunilla checked to see if she still had her things, like a ROYAL PHONE witch could be used to call help. but no!! harry potter had taken them all away. what the HELL was she going to do now??

"hey gurl..." said a THREATENING VOICE in the back side of the jail. gunilla looked there and it was LORD VOLDEMORT!!!!! "wanna build a rebellion and crush harry potters dumb ass wizard regime??"

"hmm" wondered gunilla. "that would probs help me get out of jail"

"yes its true" agreed lord voldemort. "if i get chosen as king of wizardland ill make sure to make a law that gunilla cant be inprisoneds"

"fantastic im in" said gunilla. "ok then how the hell r we going to rebel?? i mean im at least 70% sure that ur in jail too"

"hahahahahahaah" lord voldemort laughed evilly. "harry potter the dumb ass didnt even make u go through BURAUCRACIES and JURIDYCAL SYSTEMS so no body knows that ur even in jail!! hehehe there fore NOBODY WILL STOP YOU WHEN YOU GO AND give harry potter THESE"

lord voldemort gave gunilla some brightly colored boxes. in the darkness of the prison gunilla had some troubles seeing what they were... but it looked like they were video games like TONY HAWOK PRO SKATER 3 and SWEET BRO AND HELLA JEFF THE MOIVE OFFICAL LICSENSED VIDYO GAME.

"uhh what are some god damn games going to do" axed gunilla sceptically. "do u like mean that harry potter will be so distracted by some HOT GAMES that he wont even notice when u conquer the whole king dom"

"no" facepalmed lord voldemort "theyre magic games now go and give him them"

and he magic teleported gunilla out of jail.

\---

mean while in starland elsa and anna continued to be tied up (witch was kind of hot tbh but unfortunately they were too far from each other to sexx) and also continued to give birth to nuclear warheads witch was obviously P PAINFUL but both of the were masochits so they only got more turned on. but it only cuased them more pain because they couldnt fulfill their sexual urges. witch only caused them more pain, and, so on.

in the room there was a HUGE SIGN (size almost 4m2) that said !!!HUGE DANGER!!!! SEX OVERDRIVE: 98%!!!

elsa and anna knew that it meant thta they were getting too turned on to almost get magic powers and escape.

"we need to get out of here" whispered elsa "pls focus on sexy thoughts anna"

anna nodded and cried witch only caused more sex thoughsts to elsa because she was also a sadist. and then elsa focused on sEXXY THINGS like knifes and boobes and more knifes and chain saws and swords and guns and nuclear warheads that were all stabbing and killing her...

!!!SEX OVERDRIVE: 99%!! said the screen. usually a dumbg captain scientist called dr captn jack sparrow came and took his cloths off to reset the counter to 0% when elsa and anna got too close to orgamsing and escaping.

elsa knew that she couldnt get her self any more turned on and sighed.

"i cant get my girl boner any higher" sighed anna too. "elsa the last time i checked you were some kind of wizard so pls just use any bull shit magic power you just made up to help us escape"

"well the problem is DARTH VADER hasnt let me pratice my magics in a long time" elsa sighed "the only magic thing i can do is see what any body in the world is doing and that wont help us escape"

"can u view me and try to orgagsm" suggested anna. it wasnt a bad suggestion. elsa magic viewed anna and focused on her HUGE BOBS and BAUTIFUL SMILE and INCESTUAL RELATIONSHIPS and HUGE VAG and...

but the screen only said !!SEX OVERDRIVE 99,3%!!

"THATS FUCKING BULL SHIT" screamed elsa and cried. "THE GOD DAMN SCREEN DIDNT EVEN SHOW DECIMALS BEFORE"

"elsa dont give up" anna cried too "who other is sexxxy in this universe except us??"  
"uhh kind of nobody" said elsa  
"k i give u that thats p much true" shrugged anna "but what about GUNILLA??"

elsa thought about it for a minute. it was certainly true that gunilla had HUGE BOOBS and other attributes that good looking ppl often had.

"ok ill try to magic view gunilla..." said elsa and tried to magic view gunilla. but WHAT THE HELL?!?! GUNILLA WAS IN A PRISON OF SOME KINED?? holy shit thats BDSM as FUCK and bdsm is like elsas favorite thing.

"ohohahohohohohohaohoaoahooooahaohhghgghhhhhhhhhhh" elsa screamed.

!!SEX OVERDRIVE: 666%!!! said the screen. anna also orgamsed in joy but uhhh anna that doesnt help any more you are already getting out...

but anyways their shackles were BURNED OFF by the POWER OF LESBIEN INCESTUAL BDSM LOVE. elsa and anna wasted no time and immediately began sexxing each other. anna put her hair into elsas vag and elsa put her hands into annas mouth and anna put her foot in her own vag. and then they shaked until both orgamsed 6 times.

"NOW" said elsa and used the ardelian ancient magic of birthing weapons to birth a knife for both her and anna "i suggest we make DARTH VADER meet my best friend who is a KNIFE!!!!"

\---

mean while in ardelia barty anderson rose lalnode kanya maryam and dr house were hunting some big foots.

"how disadvtantageous it is to circumnutate in this woodland, for no bigfoots have we scrutinized" sighed rose lalonde. and it was kind of true. NO BIGFOOTS AT ALL tho it shouldnt really be that surprising. i mean... if big foots were easy to find wouldnt they juts be normal animals, instead of magic animals??

"there are 3 steps to succesfully finding bigfoots" said barty anderson "1th leave a bait of some kind, like a dead baby or small animal 2st go to ur car and honk ur horn 3 times slowly and 2 times VERY FAST 3st go inspect the bait and if theres no big foots well in that case you just have to offer better bait like maybe go to the store and buy some deluxe dead babies"

"WE COULD USE GUNILLAS BABY" screamed dr house angrily. "IF SHE WAS THERE!!! FUCK!!!"

"but gunillas papoose is not cadaverous" said rose lalonde. "have you not probed her tenement extensively, for you are a practitioner?"

"fuck i dont EVEN KNOW WHAT THOSE WORDS MEAN" angered dr house. "seriously AM I THE ONLY ONE HERE?? ?FUCK EVERYTHING"

"in this regard you are unaccompanied" said kanaya "i have no tribulation apprehending roses scuttlebutts, no matter how diffusive they insinuate to be"

and then rose and kanyan began to have sex, because they got girl boners when long word were said.

"SSHHHHH THE FUCK UP" said barty anderson suddenly. "do you see?? THERES A BIG FOOT THERE!!!"

and it was true, or kind of true. it was a big hairy brown thing that was walking on foot. but that could mean like almost 3 things:

1) big foot  
2) chewbaca  
3) man in big foot costume

"anyways" said barty anderson. "when u see a bigfoot, thers one important rule. to get the respect of the bigfoot, you must cahllenge it to a dual. and kill it. then other bigfoots will do whatever you want. ok who wants to duel???"

"FUCK I CAN BAARELY WALK im not gonna BASH A FUCKING BIG FOOT TO THE FUCKING HEAD WITH MY CANE" screamed dr house.

"in that contingency i can volition to clamor the prodigiouspad" said rose lalonde and drew her wand. "en garde, you incongruous baboon, varmint of unreality or personage in ensemble"

NEXT CHAPTER: ROSE VS BIGFOOT!!! CAN ELSA AND ANNA KILL DARTH VADER AND ESCAPE??? AND CAN GUNILLA KILL HARRY POTTER AND ESCAPE???


	4. CHAPTER 4: STRIFE 3X COMBOB: ROSE LALANDE VS BIG FOOT & ELSA AND ANNA VS DARH VADER & GUNILLA AND VOLDEDORT VS HARY POTTER

CHAPTER 4: STRIFE 3X COMBOB: ROSE LALANDE VS BIG FOOT & ELSA AND ANNA VS DARH VADER & GUNILLA AND VOLDEDORT VS HARY POTTER

gunilla was running around harry potters castle. and it was kind of hard findign hary potter, because ,the castle was HUGE AS FUCK (volume almost 1000m3). seriously, nearly every body in these stupid ass stories has a TOO LARGE CASTLE TO BE EVEN REMOTELY PRACTICAL. what good are large castles anyways?? i mean 1nd) catsles that big take almost ALL SPACE IN THE GOD DAMN COUNTRY. 2rd) what activities even require a catle thats big, no, thats insane 3st) the fucking country goes bankyrupt if taxes are used to care for the buildings.

but when gunilla ran and ran around the catsle she figrue dout there must be an additional reason: if castles are big then assassasins like her cant find the king of the catsle... thats actualy p smart. so MAYBE big catsles ARENT so uselsss after all?? if ur mom refuses to give u momey for buyign HUGE AS HELL castles (because shes secretly mad that u looked at elsanna pix) just tell her that.

gunilla was already getting hopeless but then she saw HARRY POTTER!!! gunilla was on top of some staris and harry potter was on the lower part.

"how did u escape the fucking jail??" harry axed astonishedly. "o wait. it doesnt matter, because, IM GOING TO PUT YOU BACK TO THE SLAMMER!!!"

and he began RUNNING UP THE STAIRS!!! just a tip, please dont run up the stairs. if u fall u will possibly fucking die, especially if this running up stairs thing happens in huge castles like hogworts in which the stairs are MAGIC and ACTUALLY EXIST IN HUGE PITS OF VOID, MOVING AROUND AND MAKING IT AT LEAST 90% SURE THAT SOME BODY FALLS DOWN THE STAIRS AND DIES EVERY YEAR.

gunilla was hlepless, because she wasnt magic unlike elsa and anna. maybe that is why the last queens were magic??? i mean magic is p useful if u are aboubt to get assassisnated the hell out of u. but anyways, theng gunilla remembered what LORD VOLDEDORT had given her...

... some MAGICAL VIDEO GAMES!!! WITCH COULD SAVE THE SITUATION..... WITH MAGIC!!!

"hey HAIRY POTTER take these" gunilla screamed and throwed the games at harry potter, king of wizardland. thats a good tip also. becaus e people will for some reason just grab things u throw at them. so, if some times u want to kill sb, maybe throw them some lava or other kinds of deudly shit.

was GAMES the thing that was deudly shit? gunilla though when she realized p much the same thing i just said and though it may have been vodemorts intention.

hary potter was shocked and... BEGAN TO FALL DOWN THE STAIRS!!!!

"OH FFUCK" he screamed when he realized that the games were actually magic piece of shit games that made u fall down stairs. AND the stairs in hogworts were P MUCH THE DANGEROUSEST STAIRS IN EXISTENCE!!!

harry pottters head hit the stair and exploded into gore. his legs hit the stair and flew across in an arc. his arms hit the stair and were torn asunder. his body hit the stairs and was crushed into an unrecognizable mess.

"well done" laughed lord volderot evilly behind gunilla. "NOW i rule wizardland!! ha hah ahhahaHAAHHAHHAHAHAHAHNHSASHHAHSHHHAHAHZ"

"NOT SO FAST!!!" scremaed harry potter and MAGICED HIMSELF BACK TO LIFE. "i should have executed you when i had the chance..."  
"witch one" axed gunilla  
"no the wizard one" said harry potter "or wait actually killing both of u sounds like the better plan. but. anyways PREPARE TO DIE YOU FOOLS!!!"

it began raining and thundering dramatically, witch was kind of stupid because they were IN A HOUSE...? but the again, MAGIC. magic is the best thing to have in stories. i mean seriously ANYTHING will AND CAN happen and ur readers will buy it like a bunchs of suckers. (dont tell anybody i said that!! hehehe)

but anyways lord voldedort raised his wand. and gunilla raised her boobs witch were the best equivalents of weapons she had since they could at least make some distracted by HUGE BOOBES.

"REX EXECUTIUM!!" screamed lord voldedort and fired a HUGE SPELL (radius almost 3m) that was filled with GREEN ENERGY and FLEW INTO HARRY POTTER.

"ooaahhhh fffuuuck!!!" harry screamed as he was hit by the spell and FUCKING MURDERED.

"thanks for helping" said lord voldedort to gunilla. "you are now free to go."  
"thanks" said gunilla "always happy to show my boobes and slash or kill the leaders of other countreis. thats diplomacy bro. uhh by the way the thing i was originally going to axe harry potter was... do u want to help me in a war against starland??"

"why is there a war" voldedort axed. "sorry i was in FUCKING PRISON and wizardland doesnt have news papers. i guess we just use magic but my wand was taken from me and it was magiced to only come back when harry potter dies. for some reason"

"oh", said gunilla. "i understand i never read the news either but anyways DARTH VADER is planning to go nuclear on the WHOLE WORLD, FUCKING DESTROYING EVERYTHING. iff i do not give him the control of ardelia.... but id rather not do that. so war time it is!! u in or not?"

"hmm" said lord voldedort. "on the other hand i like war but on the other hand i also like the whole world being destroyed. sorry bro im out"

"ok then" gunilla sighed and walked back to the royal sexcopter. the royal meeting had been kind of a fucking disaster but at least she was alive.

but when she saw the helicopter there was also another thing...... a BABBY!!!

\---

"LET US WITHSTAND!!" screamed rose lalande at the bigfoot. it was the sixth big foot, after four men in big foot costumes and one chewbacca. but at least this one seemed real and it didnt even sceram "help dont kill me im not a real bigfoot!!" unlike the others but it could have been a ruse so rose had killed them anyways.

"so u think u can defeat a big foot???" screamed the bigfoot. "WELL THEN THINK AGAIN!!!"

and when the leader big foot said that SIX MILLION BIGFOOTS SUDDENLY APPEARED BEHIND THE TREES AND ROCKS AND OTHER NATURE THINGS NEAR BY!!!!

"this is suggestive of the deleterious" whispered rose lalande to her gf kanya maryam.  
"quite irrevocable" she agreed.

mean while behind them bigfoots killed the fuck out of DR HOUSE and ROBOT BARTY ANDERSON.

"AAAAAAAHHHHH" dr house screamed.  
"i am a robot and there fore feel no pain" said barty. "but i do recognize that this situation is bad so AAAAHHHHH"

and then they fucking died.

"the ballgame has emerged as even aggrandizedly unmitigable" whispered kanya.

"esteemed commodioushoof" said rose how ever "it is congenial that you extirpated two of my compatriots."

"why??" wondered the leader big foot.

"because this symmetrizes the amphitheater" replied rose and drew her wand. kanya drew her chain saw.

the leader big foot ROARED and JUMPED at rose and kanaya with his SHAR AS FUCK CLAWS. the other 6 million big foots also did the same thing, but because there were only two of rose and kanaya, it was p much useles. like 6 big foots were even able to reach and attack the long word girls.... so what even is the point??? btw this is also a good thing in magic, because the useless dudes can just do some magic dumb spells that power the fuck out of the others.

but anyways rose screamed "KILL BIGFOOT!!" and a HUGE PURPLE BEAM shot from her wand. it hit the leader big foot RIGHT IN THE FUCKING FACE and he fell down crying.

"you are discomfitured" said rose "retrograde or go way of all flesh!!"

but the big foot was MERELY PRETENDING TO BE DEAD!!!! it JUMPED AT KANAYA AND SLASHED THE HELL OUT OF HER!!! kanya screamed "aaaahhhh" and flew back wartsds.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" scramed rose and EXPLODED INTO A FIERY RAGE EXPLOSION OF DEATHLY RAGE MAGIC THAT FLEW AROUND AND FUCKING KILLED MILLIONS OF BIGFOOTS!!! INCLUDING THE LEADER BIGFOOT!!!!!!!

rose ran to the place where kanyas corpse had flown and cried flaming tears that killed more big foots.

"my paramour has been annihilated" cried rose. "what inducement do i have to abide??"

and she drew her wand and put it next to her head, kind of like u do with guns when u want to fucking kill urself. but with a wand isted of a gun.

"ROSE TARRY!!!" kanaya screamed. "I WAS ONLY HOODWINKED TO BE UNANIMATED TO EMBOLDEN YOUR THAUMATURGY!!!"

but it was TOO LATE!!! rose screamed "MAGIC SUICIDE HELL" and a BIG BEAM OF BLOOD BURST OUT OF HER WAND, EXPLODING HER HEAD.

kanya began to cry. it was just like in hamlets.

"i guess ur the leade of big foots now" said one big foot. "what do we do"

"magnificent" cried kanaya. "i spiel... SPOLIATE THIS ACREAGE!! MISLAY NO PNEUMA COGNIZANT!!"  
"what" axed the bigoot.  
"i mean" sniffed kanaya..... "FUCKING KILL EVERYTHIGNG AND EVERYONE!!"

\---

"now lets find darth vader" whispered elsa to anna. they walked out of the elsanna nuclera birth room and founda BIG hall full of all kinds of evil stuff. like white cats. and suspicous goatees. and nuclear weapons that they had just birthed before.

"cant we just go" whipsered anna who was spooked by all the evil things. "i mean im p sure that darth vader DOESNT have evil tracking stuff on us"

"NO anna" said elsa angrily . "i want answers. like how the hell are we alive if elsa and ana the twin lesbien queen incests of ardelia just died???"

"hmm" wondered anna. "thats a p good question. but can we first at least find doridtoes and pan cakes???"

"fine" said elsa "lets go find darth vaders kitchen."

luckily they saw a sign that said "THIS WAY TO DARTH VADERS KITCHEN." so they went that way and found... DARTH VADERS KITCHEN. they checked the fridge and there were pan cakes, dead babbies and doridtos. anna decided to eat the doridtsos and pan cakes while elsa consumed the babies. to get magic bbay energy, witch would be useful in a battle.

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!" laughed some one evilly. the queens turned back wards and IT WAS DARTH DADER!!! "I KNEW THAT PACKING MY KITCHEN WITH FOOD ITEMS SO DEAR TO YOU WOULD LEAD TO THIS, IN CASE YOU ESCAPED!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

elsa and anna drew their knifes. "anserws or i KILL YOU" hissed elsa.

"fine then" said darth vader and drew his lazersword. "what do you wish to know??"

"HOW THE HELL DO WE EXIST IF THE REAL ELSA AND ANNA ARE DEAD???" demanded anna.  
"elementary, my dear anna" said darth vader. "you are clones"

elsa and anna gasped.

"and how the HELL did u get our dna???" axed elsa.  
"even simpler. i stole it when u were babies."  
"and... how did u GET NEAR ROYAL BABIES???"

darth vader laugheds. "that is the most simplest thing of all... it was because.... I! AM! YOUR! FUCKING!!! FATHER!!!!!!"

NEXT CHAPTER: WHO IS GUNILLAS BABY?? WHO IS THE BABY IN GUNILLAS HELICOPTER?? WHO IS DARH VADERS BABY?? WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BABIES??


	5. CHAPTER 5: DARH VADERTS EVIL PLAN IS REVEAL!?!?

CHAPTER 5: DARH VADERTS EVIL PLAN IS REVEAL!?!?

so. what even was hapening in this story, wait, soo gunilla was walkind to the ROYAL SEXCOPTEr and saw a baby there on the ground. her 1nd though was probs some thing like "how the hell is their even a baby on the roof??" and to b honest thats a perfectly fine 1rd thougt for seeing a baby on the roof. cause babies are fuckingt stupid and will crawl off roofs and die, and the roof of HOGWRORTS witch was hary pitters castle (and now lord voderdorts i guess) was PRETTY FUCKING HIGH.... i mean not eating maryjuana but instead high, like the height not the drugs.

and the 2st though was probably somet hing like "why does the baby look like hary potter??" but tbh thats a STUPID FUCKING THOUGHt. like gunilla i know ur some time stupid but guess what theres a reason a baby looks like its parent... i mean genetics and shit. AND the most prominent birth givers of ardelia (by witch i mean elsa and anna) uhh... they birthed babies that looked EXACTYL like the other one. but i guess from that gunilla would guess that babies look like some random other people?? well then shes just fucking dumb because a) shes pregnent HER SELF and b) her husband who is now RIPped in peace is a GOTDAMND DOCTORS...

... wait fuck. i gotta rant about this thing now. WHY DO ELSA AND ANNA GIVE BIRTH T OEACH OTHER, WITCH IS like the whole premise of this stupud story but it doesnt make ANY SENSE. i guess their father is DARTH VADERS, if he isnt lying, but tbh DARH VADER is prob the FATHEREST FATHER IN POPULAR CULTURE tbh its p much confirmed that hes their actual father. witch means that darh vader has sexx w elsa and she births anna, and then he has sex with anna and she births elsa. but how the fuck is that even possible???? annas parents are darh vaeder and elsa. elsas parents are darrth vader and anna. the ONLY way this makes ANY sense is that elsa and anna are geneticaly identical. or, can it work?? i dont know. HEY IF YOU KNOW HOW THIS SHITS WORKS PLZ HIT ME UP AT alexandarstubbp@gmail.com THANK!!!

but the point here is that gunilla saw a baby, a point witch is reached afther three fucking wall of text paragraps. i guess the morale here is, that some time when u write storyes u just HAVE to begin ranting about how the story fucking doesnt make any sense. at least if the story is good and intresting enoug to have details that make no sense so FACK YOU HATERS!!!!

but anyways theres gunilla and a baby. and the baby looked like fuckin hary potter.

"what" wondered gunilla. "how come theres a baby that looks like harry potter. srsly is this just magics or....?"

"no you ididot" siad the baby "you dont need magics to normally give birth, GOD"

"sory for axing" answered gunilla diplomaticalyl because she didnt want to insult some random baby on the roof. "then i guess the questien is that, who are you, baby?"

"you stutid fuck ass hole i am HEDWING POTTER and i am HARRY POTTERS SON" hedwign potter said. "and who the hell r u and why should you care?? at least help me steal thist stupid helycopter with 'sexx copter' writen on it for some reason what even is sex??"

gunilla wanst going to tell what sex is to a randomr oof baby, so she just answerered the other question. by the way, if u r a baby and reading this 1th congrats for learning to read as baby and 2rd STOP READING NOW THIS STROY WILL TELL YOU WHAT SEX IS. but i guess it already did tho

the point is that gunila said: "hi im gunilla the queen of ardelia and whoops i just killed ur father lol"

the baby witc was HEDWIG POTTER gasped. "you killed my father PREPARE TO DIE"

gunilla steped back wards. babies werent mostly threatening at all, but this was clearly a VERY ADVACNED baby because it could even TALK, witch was probaby magic. and if some thing can talk it can proabably kill you, so if some body ever talks to u FUCKING RUN AWAY!!! IF THEY CAN TALK THEY CAN VERY VERY LIKELY, KILL YOU!!!!!

"my fater said this" saidd hedwing potter "hey hedwing stalin dumblydore potter whats up bro u were named after the 3most bestest ppl i know. 1th my owl who tbh really isnt a people. but anyways he was cool as fuck before being killsed. and 2rd stalin who was some dude in hitsory and probs a cool dude. and 3th dumledore who is a wizard who works in ardelia and is probs a cool dude and not plotting revolution or any crazy shit like that. anyways this is getting p long andmy point here is that if sb ever insults you just KILL THEM cause ur cool man. and if u want to say this cool thing witch tbh makes u look COOL AS HELL leave out most of my rambling because the other dude has prob killed u by the time ur finished with my lengthy–"

but gunilla had already grabbed the baby from its butt. HEDWING POTTER bited and clawed at the air furiously but couldnt hit any thing, because gunilla was obviously BEHIND HIM. i mean, if u grab sb from their BEHIND then u must be BEHIND them... heh.

"PUT ME BACK TO GROUND U STUPID SHIT SO THAT ICAN HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!" screamed hedwing potter and began to cry becausee babies are just stypid like that. getting tears when theye OWNED. i didnt even cry when my mom yelled at me for looking at hot elsanna pixx so SUCK IT, BABIES!!!

"no ur just going to kill me im not THAT stupid" said gunilla. "anyways sorry for having a part in killing ur dad bby but tbh he was kind of shitty and threw me into the slmaeer"

"NOOOO" said hedwing potter "THATS IM POSSIBLE NOOOOOOOOOO"  
"no its TRUE AS HELL" said gunilla.  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO" nooed still hedwing potter.  
"stop saying the letters N and O you shit" axed gunilla politely.  
"k" said hedwing potter. "FUUUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKK UUUUUUUU"  
"just STOP and SHIT UP" angered gunilla.  
"im a baby i do what ever i want" said hedwing potter.  
"yeah" said gunilla "like cry and SHIT IN YOUR DIAPER LIKE A STUPID BABY ASS SHITDIAPER!!!"

that burn was so sick that hedwing potter finally shut up. latert some scientits came and measured the sickness of the burn and it was aproxyimately 8359559 megasicks and the MOST SICKEST BURN IN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE.

"ok" said gunilla "like i said im sorry for kiling ur father. but tbh that voldemort dude seems like a shitty ruler too so what if i help u make a god damn revolution?"

"ok that sounds fair" said HEDWING POTTER. "COMMENCE OPERATION: VOLDEDORT REVOLUTION!!!!"

"just wait a bit" said gunilla and dropped hedwin potter to the ground. she went to the sexcopter and used the royal sexcopter telephone. everything was likely just fine in ardelia so she decided to do some other thing that was important.

"hey", heyed gunila. "listen, u know about the DATH VADER situation right? im gonna need some information about their weapons and armies and other war things, like r the nuclaer weapons real or just bluff?? ill pay you VERY GOOD, ok thanks see you"

"who was that" axed hedwing potter.

"the greates tdetective in the world" said gunilla.

"ok was it sherlork holmes??"  
"no"  
"what about dr waston"  
"no"  
"FUCK. what about pourot the french dude with a epic stache"  
"no"  
"SHIT HELL DICK FUCK. WHAT about.... MISS MARLEP???"  
"lol shes just some old lady she wouldnt stand against DARH VADERS lazer swords"

hedwing potter sweared like 90000 times. kind of rude tbh but honetsly there probably arent social rules against babies swearing because UMMM..... MOST BABIES...... CANT TALK??? "OK FUCK THITS I GIVE UP WHO IS IT???"

gunilla sighed. "its BAT MAN the worlds best detectide. and robin i guess, you stupid baby"

"wow", angered hedwing potter "SORRY FOR BEING CULTURED AND NOT THINKING THAT BAT MAN IS AMONG THE CLASSIC DETECTVIVES!!"

\---

and meanwhile in STARLAND, elsa and anna were SUPRRISED AS FUCK that DARTH VADER was their dad. and also, i guess that they were CLONES???? i mean darh vader being the fathe is the CLASSICEST TWIST OF ALL TIME. no sequal can really hold up!!! and tbh if even his fucking name is dARTH VADER witch means DARK FATHER in sweden. because hes a DARK FATHER witch means that hes evil and makes the clones of his daugheters, to give birth to nuclear weapons. im p sure that that was darthvaders actual plan in STAR WAR too but he never captured PRINTCESS LEIA to do the nuclear birthing.

wait, does this mean that ELSA AND ANNA ARE PRINCESS LEA???? HOLY SHIT. WAIT LEts think of similarties. 1th incets, witch they both like. 2st being rulers of stuff. 3nd being darth vaders daughters. this TOTALLY HOLDS THE FUCK UP

but i guess the point herei s that, ELSA AND ANNA WERE SURPRISED (AND ALSO PRINCES LEIA) AND DATH VADER WASNT SURPRISED, BECAUSE HE ALREADY KNEW THE THING BECAUSE HE WAS THE FUCKING ONE TO REVEAL IT!!!

"what does this even mean" anna agered "PLEASE EXPLAIN DAD"

"you stupid incestshits" said DRATH VADER. "it means that i sexxed elsa to birth anna and then sexxed anna to birth elsa and while sexxing stole their dna and then cloned YOU, my dear nuclear weapon birth factoreis"

"YEAH WE GOT that DAD" angered elsa "but WHY???? WHY do u want to rule ardelia so bad???"

"thats a long fuckin story" DARHH VADER SAID. "but anyways here goes. first i sexxed ur mothers by witch i mean u. it was very strange and then they disappared, to time travel or some shit like that. i odnt really understand this confusing temporal spacial mess. BUT ANYWAYS i read into ardelian lore and sacred baby prophesies prohpecied by stoned weed idiots. ANDD what they say that is.... THAT ELSA AND ANNA, BY WITCH I MEAN YOU, ARE THE MORTAL INCARNATIONS OF THE GOD ELSANNA OF FERTILITY. there fore u have some SPECIAL powers like giving birth to things."

"that didnt even anser the question you dumb dick" angered anna.

"im still EPXLAINING IT" angered DARTH VADER. "if you want to read something without long explanations READ SOME THING ELSE!!! anyways like i was saying u 2 are the pieces that make up ELSANNA THE DEITY OF FERTILITY. and why the hell is this even important. well, a special baby legends says that ELSANNA was the one to give birth to this universe..... AND WILL BE THE ONE TO DESTROY IT, AND BIRTH A BRAND NEW WORLD. and why the hell is that. well apparently some evil abomination called the 'BABY EATING DEMON' some how corrupted this universe. well guess what my daughters. THIS. IS. BULL. SHIT!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK even IS a BABY EATING DEMON??? i have NEVER seen a fucking baby eating demon. i am NOT going to watch the universe being remade and EVERY BODY DYING just because some ass holes think that some stupid baby eating demon is bad or some thing. there fore i shall CONQUER ARDELIA and prevent the rest of the prohpesy from EVER HAPENING!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"

then DARTH VADER laughsed some more. being evil was GREAT because you could always just evilly laugh at things, like if some body slips and falls or if ur mom is angery after seeing u looking at elsanna pixx. there fore DARTH VADER laughed lots and lots, even tho his plan didnt really seem THAT evil..... i guess we will see.

but wihle he was laughing, ELSA AND ANNA HAD ESCAPED!!!! HOLY FUCK

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO", noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooed DARH VADER. "my evil plan is RUINED only because some ass hole lesbien incets queens COULDNT STAY THERE FOR A FEW FUCKING MINUTES!!!!!"

"what happened my lord" screamed dr cap jack sparrow and ran in because he head DARTH VADER noooing and DARTH VADER always nooooooed when some thing was bad. there fore, some thing was bad now. FUCK THE PROBLEM OF INDUC TION

"MY NUCLEAR WARHEAD BIRYHING MACHINE DAUGHTERS JUST FUCKING ESCAPED!!!" scaremed DARH VADER.

"WOW" gasped dr cap jack sparrow "how fucking RUDE is that"

DARH VADER sighed. "but we HAVE to go to the war EVEN WTIHOUT NUCLEAR WEAPANS. STARLAND is still the most advanced country EVER, so FUCKING THROW ALL RESOURCES INTO WEAPONS AND ROBOT SOLDIERS!!!! NO MATER WHETHER MY TRAITOR DUAGHTERS DECIDE TO JOIN ARDELIA OR NOT, THIS! IS! FUCKING! WAR!!!!!!!!!"

NEXT CHAPTER: WHAT DOES BATMAN DOO???? DO HEDWING AND GUNILLA SUCCEED??? WHAT HAPPENS TO ELSA AND ANNA??? WHO IS DARH VADERS BABY???


	6. CHAPTER 6: BAT MAN VS DARH VADER: DAWN OF PRAGANANCY

CHAPTER 6: BAT MAN VS DARH VADER: DAWN OF PRAGANANCY

elsa and anna had escaped DARH VADERS EVIL HIDE OUT but they were still in STAR LAND witch was the country where DARTHVADER and all that shit was in the 1nd place. there fore they were kind of lost because star land was a HUGE country (area almost 800m2). and even when elsa and anna came as fast as they could they were STILL travelling thru starland.

"im tired eelsa" anna creid. she didnt even have doridtos and if u remember from the last fic anna FUCKING LOVEd doridtos. more than any person even could. witch was a SECRET HINT that anna was really a half of elsanna, god of pragnancy.

"im too my lesbien queen love" said elsa even if TECHINICALLY they WERENT EVEN QUEENS ANYMORE. or were they?? wait fuck cloning like totally DESTROYS THE ENTIRE OF LAWS.... if u r a clone r u legally ur original version or not?? can u get blamed for their crimes? well obs FUCK No because that would just be the STUPIDEST thing ever.... wow just imagine being a clone of some ass hole like my mum who yells when i loo kat HOT ELSANNA PIX. and then ppl already hate u but EVEN THE LAW HATES YOU, WHAT THE FUCK. im at least 99% that the law SHOULDNT MAYBE JUDGE PPL FOR THINGS THEY HAVENT EVEN DONE?!!? so there fore clones are JURIDICSALLY DISTINCT FROM THEIR ORIGINAL COPIES. but FUCK this opens even MORE issues. srsly like look at elsa and anna, ok they arent even queens any more because everyb1 thinks they fucking died. and then gunilla was DEMORCRTACTIYALLY sELECTED AS QUEEN. wait fuck i forgot queens arent even supposed to be democratcies but fuck it im in middle of some another rant so MAYBE NEXT TIME WHEN THE WORD "QUEEN" GET SMENTIONED.

but anyways the point here was that elsa and anna were in traveling in starland. but wait fuck i didnt even finish my last rant ok here goes iF CLONE ELSA AND ANNA ARE LAGALLY DISTINCT FROM ELSA AND ANNA THEN THERE ARE HuGE FUCKING ISSUES (size almost 7). 1rd how do they even GET things that u can only get from being in society?? the clones are probably over 18 and there fore HAVE TO SUPPORT THEM SELVES (im p sure that mr and mrs frozen are also dead so THEIR PARENTS ARE DEAAAD) but HERS THE PROBLEM: they have no fucking education. i mean the story kind of implies that elsa and anna DEFINATLY DONT have memories of the "real" elsa and anna..... so THEY DIDNT EVEN GO TO KINDER GARDEN WHAT THE FUCK. good luck trying to get a job. also they arent even citizens of ANY COUTNRY and DONT HAVE SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBERS or aNY MONEY or ANYTHING. srsly being a clone would FUCKING SUCK.

ANYWAYS elsa and anna were travelling thru star land and not worrying aboujt their WORRYING JURYDICAL STATUS IN REGARS TO THEIR ORIGINAL VERSIONS. starland i guess was snowy and cold just like the planet from star war. and had HUGE MOUNTAINS (height almost 5000000km) that elsa and anna hadd to GET OVER to GET OUT OF THE COUNTRY.

"but I WONT GIVE UP" screamed elsa at nobody. witch was a pretty much fucking stupid idea since thye JUST ESCAPED and WERE PROBABLY CHASED, CURRENTLY??? "we will GO OVER THOSE HUGE ASS MOUNTAISN and THEN CLAIM THE QUEENHOOD OF ARDELIA, like WE DESERVE"

"uhhh elsa" axed anna "im p sure that we will FUCKING DIE since its cold and we only have sexxy not warm cloths our pervv daddy gave us"

"oh right" saddened elsa "because im a physics let me just take a moment to calculate the possibility that we die. ok i did it and its fucking 107%"

heres a tip for u dudes out there: when the probablyties start going over 100% then SHIT IS GETTING REAL. elsa and anna knew that very well and there fore decided to have some sort of plan, other than "go up the god damn mountains and p much freeze to death and become FROZEN just like the name of the moive but the name of this story is THE BABIES ARE 2 and not FROZEN 2 (tho elsanna is canon in both) so WHAT ABOUT WE NOT DO THAT"

but anyways starland was so cold that there were almosts no ppl there. and im at least 204% sure% (REMEMBER THE LAST PROTIP PLS) that DARH ADER took like most of the popilation and made them into crazy killer robots becaus eorganic things turning into kill bots is p much a tbau traiditon.

but there was a single house there (at least next to elsa and anna) that said LEOLAS' TAVERNT at the top with a wooden sign. elsa and anna were big fans of the rolle play game ICES & INSCETS so they knew that tavern was like p much the news station before the internet and the phones and all that modarn shit happened by witch i mean: IF U WANNA KNOW WHAT ARE THE HAPS AND THE INTERNET ISNT REAL JUST GO TO A TAVERN DUMPASS.

and there fore they went inside. the tarven was WARM AS HELL (tempareture almost 100K) witch was p good for business. i mean a tavern where u FREEZE TO FUCKING DEATH doesnt sound like a good busienss cause 1nd) no body even wants to go there.... 3st) your customers FUCKING DIE so good luck getting them to pay, or even come again. so a FREEZE TO DEATH TAVERN would p much FUCKIN SUCK.

and yeah inside the tavern there were some ppl. and the tavern keeper who was probably called LEGOLAS was some kind of fucking elf. elsa and anna bought some drinks and pancakes and doridtos and some normal food for elsa and also better cloths (good point: not die bad point: not as sexy).

"so what are the news" said elsa who was genre savy enough to know the tavern thing witch i said earlier. you didnt read it?? well GO BACK AND DO SO my rants are fucking important to the story and themes and plots and stuff (seriulsy).

"the news are that some lesvien incests queens of ardelia who were cloned just escaped from DARH VADEs evil deathquarters."

"wow DEATHQUARTERS is a fucking cool name for a place" whipsered elsa to anna "pls take a note"

and the she said "hey im at least 90% sure that WE ARE THE LESBIEAN INCETS CLONE QUEENS"

"cool" said legolass "anyways i was jus tthinking if ur clones then how can you be queens"

"i could care less about BURAUCRACY" scremaed elsa angrily and did the thing with ur hand that u do when ur angry. THE GHOST OF KAFKA cried of happy in his grave, wait fuck ghots dont have graves, lets just say KAFKAS SKELETON but wait, fuck,, skeletons dont have eyes. anyways KAFKAS SKELETON just did some thing sksletons do when they are happy. wow it must SUCK 2 be a skeleton because showing that your happy is, FUCKING HARD...

"but anyways" said anna "we were kind of wondering if u would want 2 help us get over those fucking mountains and maybe get back to ardelia witch is the country we are lesbien incests queens of" said anna.

"k sure" said legoals. "the taverns kind of shit anyways since darth vader made all citizen of this stupid country into DEARTHBOTS expect me since he likes to drink here"

and then they left.

\---

MEANWHILE.... while some ppl left STARLAD.... some other ppl CAME INTO STARLAND, as fast as they could.

and who the ppl were were BAT MAND AND ROBIN!!! sirously u know who the fuck bat man and tobin are. bat man is the bat dude who punches ppl to their faces and is smart and heroic and his PARANTS ARE DEEAAAD!!!! and robin i guess is just the dude who has a sligtly more rediculous costuume and hangs out with bat man. im not sure if his PAREANTS ARE DEAADD!!!! but they might as well as be cause this is a SEROUSY FUCKING STORY and we have NO TIME AT ALL for ROBINS PARENT ADVENTURES IN THE ADULT LIFE, like going 2 the bank, or paying bills, or watching the politics, or going to a boring job, or killing urself due 2 the hopeless existential dread u feel all the time, or bying groceries.

and anyways now in the story was time for BAT MANS ANR ROBINES DECTEVTICE ADVENTURES!!! WITCH PROBLY INVOLVE investiGATING, AND POUNCHING, TO THE FACE, BECAUSE BAT MAN ALWAYS PUNCHES TO THE FACE AND BAT MANS PARENTS ARE DEEAAADDD!!!!

"wow bat man" axed robin "where do u think DARH VADERTS DEATHQUARTERS are???"

"lets see" said bat man "if u seriously are that fucking stupid, u blabbering imbecile. there are 2 buildings. 1rd is a tavern and the 2rd the fucking huge black building witch is decorated with corpses and bones and blood and skeletins and says DARH VADERS DEATHQUARTESR at the top. NOW WITCH ONE COULD IT BE????"

"the 2st one" suggested robin.

"no you FUCKING IDIOT its obviously a DISTACTION" angered bat mand and punched robin TO HIS FUCKING FACE because his PARANTS WERE DEAAAAAAD!!!!!

and ther efore they went to the tavern. witch was empty, because the only ppls who even were ther just left. bat man adn robin were surprised because apparently they didnt even read the whole goddamn fucking story. uhhhh its RIGHT THER EON THE TOP, FUCKING READ IT IF U SERIOUSLY WaNT TO BE A CHARACTER...?

"uh oh bat man looks like this tavern is abandoned" said robin.

bat man began to cry and stole a blue elf beer witch was P FUCKNIG HIPO CIRITICAL BECAUSE HES A DETECTIVE AND DETEDTVIES ARE LIKE POLICES BUT BETTER AND POLICES ARENT SUPPOSED TO BREAK THE LAW???? and then bat man began to drink and cry while sobbing "fuck fuck fuck sHIT im the WORST SHIT DETCEVEI in THE FUCKIN WORLD its no wonder that my parents are FUCKING DEAAADDD!!!!!"

"shhh bat man its ok" said robin sadly. but when he sat next to bat man to also drink (uhhh robin im at least 60% sure that your UNDER AGE, you sHOLDENT BE DRINKING MAYBE???) he suddnely FELL INTO A FUCKING HOLE, WITH THE CHAIR.

"holy fucking shit" bat man said "thats was DEFANTLY 2 much alcohool 4 my body right there"

"BAT MAN HELP mE PLS!!" screamed robin from the hole, witch made bat man realize that the thing maybe wasnt alcohol hallinication. and he also jumped into the hole.

"now im startin to understand this shit" bat man said happily. "darh vaer must use this hole passage to go to drink to the tavern!! and heres why it is like it: darth vader hates sand. snow is kind of like sand so DRTH VADER ALSO HATES SNOW. and thers snow outs ide. so when datth vader wants to go to the tavern hed obviulsy use a SECERT PASSAGE, wITCH IS THIS VERY PASSAGE." detective of the year RIGHT THERE.

"wow holy incest u must be right" said robin "uhh what about we follow this passage into DARTH VADERS DEATHQUARTERS"

"ok lets do it" said bat man "but WATCH OUT FOR TRAPS."

and then they followed the SECRET PASSAGE, witch was dark and secretious witch means that it was a secert. bat man had EXPLICTLY told robin to WATCH OUT FOR TRAPS but ROBIN WAS A BAD DETECTIVE WHO ALWAYS FUCKS EVERYTHING UP SO HE TRIGGERED A TRAP!!!

a MAGIC GENIE came out from the trap and said "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAJHHHAAHJhajhahjhajjajaajjajajajaj11111111111!!! I AM DARH VADERS SECERT TRAPGENIE!!!"

"holy shit" bat man said and stepped back wards because that sounded like some seriousus shit. because of the EVIL LAUGHETR.

"and now...." said the geine "i COULD inflitc u with PHYSICAL PAIN but i SHALL NOT. isntead i shall tortrure you with LASTING SPYCHOLOGICAL SCARS!!!! AND THE THING I SHALL DO, TO INFLICT UPON YOU, THE PREVIOOUSLY MENTIONED LASTING PSYCHILOGICAL SCARS, IS...... TO KILL YOUR PARANTS!!!!"

"ok cool plan dude" bat man angered. "but you didnt notice one thing about my parents"

"ok what is it" axed the genie "i mean i am always happy to IMPROVE MY TORTURE FOR THE NEXT UNLUCKY SOULS THAT SHALL WANDER INTO MY DIMENSION OF TORMENT"

"the thing is...." said bat man "MY PARENTS TAUGHT ME HOWW TO PUNCH OTHER PPL INTO THEIR FUCKING FACES!!!!!"

and bat man punched the magic genie into its face and it fucking dieed. rip in fucking peace bro said robin.

and anyways then they went forward into the passage and ARRIVED TO DATH VADERS DEATHQUARTERS!!! HOPY SHIT!! robin suggeted that they find DARTH VADER and 1rd) axe him for information about the things they were supposed to axe information about 2st) punch to fucknig face 3th) fucking kill. but bat man was SMARTER THAN THAT and sugetsed that they go into VENT SHAFTS of the DEATHQUARTESR. so they did.

the DDEATHQUARTERS VENT SHAFTS were empty and full of shit, witch means both full of shit and full of varyous things that can be together called shit. robin complained that he got shit into his skin because he didnt even wear pants, what the fuck robin. but bat man punched him into the face to shut him up.

they paused when they sensed SOME THING ESCPAECIALLY EVIL near. bat man had a magic power to DETECT EVIL THINGS witch was p handy when u were a detective, like a dude who fights EVIL THINGS. but tbh bat man didnt even really need that sense because in BATLAND wher ebatman FIGHTED CRIME it was so that EVERT FUCKING CRIMINAL WAS FUCKNIG INSANE. and committed ONLY CRIMES REALYTED TO SOME SPECIFIC THEME, like cats, or clowns, or two things, or incest, or being scared, or stuff like that.

BUT ANYWAYS THE POINT WAS THAT BAT MAN SENSED SOMETHING REALLY EVIL. so he and robin stopped to look from the vent shaft hole.

"my creation is ready my lord" said dr cap jack sparrow.  
"EXCELEnt" said DARH VADER!!! "im p glad that NUCLAER BABY MAGIC ENERGY harvetsed from my traitor lesbien incets queen daughters was enough for this, MAYBE WE CAN WIN THE WAR AFTER ALL!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!"

"what is the thing" axed robin.

"wait is some body FUCKING CRAWLING AROUND THE VENT SHAFTS AND WHISPERING THINGS???" angered darh vader "HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD U TO FIX THAT FUCKING SECURITY LEAK MY HUSBAND DR CAP JACK SPERROW????"

"im sorry daddy PLEASE DONT HIT ME" dr cap jack sparrow cried.

bat man decided that enough talking was done now, and not too enough punching thigs to their fucking faces was done now. there fore, HE PUNCHED THE VENT SHAFT INTO PIECES ADN JUMPED IN TO THE ROOM WITH ROBIN... AND THEN.... THEY SAW THE ULTIMATE EVIL CREATURE CCREATED BY DR CAP JACK SPARROW.... AND.... IT WAS....

.......  
...  
....  
....... THOMAS "HELLSATAN" THE NUCLEAR TANK ENGINE APICALYPSE TRAIN!!!!!!!!!

NEXT CHAPTER: CAN BAT MAN DO THE DETECTIVE THINGS??? AND CAN GUNILLA DO THE REVOLIUTION THINGS??? AND DO ELSA AND ANNA FALL IN LOVE WITH LEGOLAS??? AND WHO IS DARTH VADERS BABY??


	7. CHAPTER 7: ELSANNA AND LEGOLAS CLIMB THE BABY MAGIC MOUNTAIN

CHAPTER 7: ELSANNA AND LEGOLAS CLIMB THE BABY MAGIC MOUNTAIN

meanwhile elsanna and legolas were climbing the baby magic mountain, witch was magical and babytiful. and also HIGH as FUCK (higher than anna after eating 6000 weed pan cakes) and COLD as FUCK (colder then elsa when she was using her ice powers witch were Cold AS FUCK (colder than -6000 kevlins witch is a unit for coldness u dumbas)).

but the point here is that elsanna and legolas were climbing up a mountain, witch was p hard even after they looted some magic winter cloths from a near by house where some old starlander had lived up in the mountain. and the wind blew HARD as FUCK (harder than elsa and anna frequntly "blew" each others vags, and that is HARD AS FUCK fyi) and it just THREW ELSANNA AND LEGOLAS AROUND and BURYED THEM IN THE SNOW witch is p bad because not even hard as hell mountains like MOUNT EVERENST usually do that?? i mean i havent even went to mount evernest but im at least 90% sure bcause i saw a documentery and there wasnt even any HARD AS HELL WINDS basically TOSSING PEOPLE AROUND LIKE THEYRE MOTHER FUCKERS WHO DONT ANSERT TO ANYONE.

"what the FUCKC is even HAPENIng in this BIRTCH ASS MOUNTAIN!!!!" screamed elsa when a evil gust of wind threw her at least 700m in the air and then bak into the ground exept that you dont really throw some body to GRONUND because theres this thing caled GRAVITYTION witch is p much MAGIC and it just THROWS PEOPEL, but NEGATIVELY by witch i mean INTO TEH GROUND, witch is DOWN and NOT UP LIKE THE SKY.

"well its a magic baby mountain" said legolas "whaht the hell did u except?? NO MAGIC??? well its not called the NO MAGIC baby mountain witch would be p stupid because whothe hell names a mountain after not being magic, seriously i have seen like 6 things that have NOTHING to do with magic to day, saying that some thing is not magic is USELESS."

"i havent even heard of a magic baby mountain tho???" axed anna. anna maybe ur just kind of stupid because who the hell doesnt hear of a MAGIC BABY MOUNTAINT witch is a P FUCKING INSANE THING TO EVEN EXIST. seriously just imagine that sudenly some stupid nobody cares mountain is turned into a BABY MAGIC MOUNTAIN, who the hell is the news media that ISENT covering that story p much like 100% of the day??? who the hell cares about donold trump becoming the prez and harambabe dying and all shit like that when theres a BABY MAGIC MOUNTAIN, WHAT THE FUCKING HELL.

"but the mountain isent even that far from ardelia...." said legolas "its like 3 countries. theres ardelia, then sweden, then some destroyed nuclear desert country and then starland where the mountain is. uhh how the hell havent u heard of it??"

"u know DARTH VADER LORD OF STARLAND isnt really public with his politics" said elsa smartly. of course shes savvy about fuckingn politics even tho shes A CLONE and shoudlnt even KNOW ANYT HING. expect if DARH VADER told her and anna some things, and uhhhh how the hell did anna then NOT know??? this shit makes no sense. DO U USE MAGIC TO WATCH POLITICS ELSA???? ok then maybe thats a GOOD use of magic, instead of having MAGIC SEX all the time and BIRTHING MAGIC BABIES. the world would be a p fucking good place if more ppl used magic to follow politics and less ppl gave birth to magic babies just fyi.

"anyway" said legolas because he sensed that this was a time for exposition "these mountains were called some thing like URAL MOUNTAINS in the past but then some thing stupid and baby magical happened and they are now MAGIC BABY MOUNTAINS"

"cool" said anna  
"are we even going to do any babymagics here???" axed elsa. "i mean it SOUNDS like we have p huge fucking problems ahead, like DARH VADER going nuclear on ardelia. AND if he doesnt go nuclear then he will at least have a war. sooo..... any magicing here legolas???"

"i dont think so" said legolas "maybe we should just go"  
"but why??" axed elsa "i mean lets do some magic!!! theres fucking bound to be some MAGIC BULLSHIT ENERGY that helps us make magics"

FOR FUCKS SAKE ELSA THIS IS OBVIOUS SEQUEL SET UP. your the fucking queen of ardelia havent you ever watched at trilegy??? the first part is juts like boring and has no events because the cerators arent even sure if they will get money to do the next ones, like star wors. and then HOLY SHIT THE FUCKING MOIEV IS PROPULAR AS FUCK!!! ALL THE MONEYs ArE FALLING FROM THE SKY!!! and then its time to do MORE MOIVES, but because of SUCH FUCKING BULLSHIT, the first part doesnt even have any FORE SHADOWING AND ALL THAT SHIT. i mean DARH VADER being lukes father is a FUCKING RETCON, GERGE LUCAS I WONT STAND FOR THIS. you know what star wars dude. DARH VADER has 2 childs and theyre called ELSA AND ANNA. and i guess some other childs soon since he is pregnont. BUT ANYWAYS STAR WARS 1 IS THE CANON ONE AND ITS NOT EVEN CALLED START WARS 4 SUCK IT GERGE LUCAS AND DARH VADER BIRTHED ELSA AND ANNA AND NOT LUKE AND LEYA!!!!!! FUCK YU!!!!!!!

fucking hell witch asine point were we even in the middle of pointing out. NOW i remember ELSA, SHUT THE FUCK UP & STOP THE FUCK UP. what u see here is a PRIME FUCKING EXAMPLE OF "SEQUEL BEIT". we are nOW setting up this "BABY MAGIC MOUNTAIND" and THEN when the last part comes and everybody gives birth and whateever the fuck even happens in the finales of "THE BABIES ARE US" stories and THEN the dudes who read this shit will be all like "shit. fuck. THE BABY MAGIC MOUNTAIN DIDNT EVEN GET MENTIONED! shit i need to give my momey to the sequel so that i may finally know this enchanting tale of baby magic mountains"

AND ELSA YOUR RUINING THIS!!! SO STOP WANTING TO DO BABY MAGICS THIS INSTANT!!!! OR I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU LIKE I DID THE LAST TIME!!!

"by 'do magics' i mean SEX you fucking imbicile" said elsa angrily and sexxily to legoles.  
oh ok THAT works fine, as long as the sex as NO MAGIC AT ALL.  
"oh" said legoals.  
"yeah i can definitily agree to that!!!" screamed anna in excitement. "theres basically NO SITUATION WHAT SO EVER where some HOTT LESBIEN INCEST SEX WONT HELP (AND THE SEXX IS ALSO WITH LEGOLAS WHO ISENT A LESBIEN AND NOT INSEST BUT ANYWAYS)"

i think i have ranted enough already, but anna pls be careful. what if some insane dude thretened to DESTROY THE fucKING WORLD but ONLY IF you havve sexx?? thats a p good situation where SEX DOESNT HELP, so SHUT UP before you say something that u will regret later.

"ok why not" said legolas. "lets do this shit dudes i mean grils"

and elsa and anna threw their cloths away, and probably FUCKNIG DIED OF COLD JUST SECONDS AFTER. fucking hell. oh wait i forget that ANNA HAS FIRE POWERS, and every body knows that COLD + FIRE = NOT COLD. so THERE FORE they dont die and neither does legoles and this ISENT THE STUPIDEST STORY IN THE WHOLE UNIVESRE.

and legolas also removed his cloths, because thats what u do when u have sexx, stupidd. serously have u even TRIED CLOTHS SEX??? ITS NOT GOOD. 1rd you dont see how big the BOOBES and the BUTTS and the MAN TOWERs of the other person are. and THATS LIKE THE 596% OF WHATS HOT WITH SEX?????? SO why the hell wouldnt you throw ur cloths away. fuck i need some other points since i started to make this into a list. ok uhhh how about 2st ur cloths maybe get dirty, because while in sex, all kidns of things like "man juice", "girl blood juice" and "babies" come out of various body parts??? so then they would get into ur cloths, witch is PRETY FUCKING ANOYING.

but the point here is that elsa, anna and legolas began haveing sex, WITH NO CLOTHS BECAUSE THATS JUST STUYPID. JUST LIKE I JUST EXPLAINED. pls go read that shit againd if you STILL Dont believe that cloths sex is FUCKING STUPID. but lett me tell you, IT IS STYPID???? so the point is that no cloths on the three dudes.

legolas inserted his dirk into elsas eye. elsa insrted her boobes into annas vag. anna inserted her finger into legoles ass. leolas inserted his second dirck into annas vag. elsa insreted her second boob into legolas mouths. anna inserted her foot into legolas mouth. and then they began rytmically basically shaking, like u usually do when u have sex.

"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaooooooooooohuuuuuuuuuuuhoooooooooo" legolas sceamed  
"iiiiiiiouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuooooooooeehgghhhhhh" anna screamed  
"ooooooooooooooooooooaaaaareeeeeehhjiuuuuuuuuuuuu" elsa sceramed

they all came severel times. but the sitaution wasent HOT ENOUGH so anna figured out some others stuff she could do. anna BITED INTO LEGOLASS EAR AND...... IT FUCKING CAME OFF!!! elsa and anna screamed startledly (not because of violens and gore, because they LOVE VIOLESN AND GORE) but because THE EAR OF LEGOLAS WAS BASICALLY FAKE???? WHAT THE HELL???!?! IT WAS A FAKE EAR!!?!?!

"WHAT THE FUCK" scerarmed elsa  
"WHAATAOTOT THHHEH FIIICKCK???" screamed anna

"wait i can explain why im a person in elf costume instead of a real elf!!!" screamed legolas. "1rd elfs dont even fuckin exist, THATS FUCKING STPID. or WOULD be if ELVES EXISTSED, WITCH THEY DO NOT. 2st i needed to conceal my identity because im really the 'FAMOS BABY PROPHET' who is MICHEL DE MONTAINGNE"

"HOLY SHIT" screamd elsa "ARE YOU THE MICHEL DE MONTAIGNE WHO IS ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK AND DOES BABH PROPHESIES??"

"yes thats me" said michel de montaigne "or r u aware of any other FUCKING BABY PROPHET DUDES WHO GET HIGH, MUTTER SOME SACRED SHIT ABOUT BABIES OR WHATEVER THE FUCK, AND ARE ALSO CALLED MICHEL DE MONTAIGNE, WHO IS ME???"

"i mean im not sure" said elsa. "i havent met every ppl in the world, so how the fuck could i know what kind of crazy shit is real in this messed up world???"  
"thats like NOT THE POINT" screamed michel de montainge "the point is that im MICHEL DE MONTAIGNE"

"ok then i have a qusestion" said anna. and anna GOD FUCKIN DAMNIT it BETTER NOT BE ABOUT PAN CAKES because your already kind of the stupider lesbien insest queen, fucking hell. "i thogh about axing about pan cakes but i now have a better question. uhhh if your hiding ur identity then why the hell did u now reveal it??? i mean im at least 50% sure that there are other dudes who wear elf ears all the time as some fucking fetisht thing so.... uhh u really didnt need to tell us that ur michel de montaigne the famous baby propehet who drinks weed and makes prophecies??"

"that is a good question indeed" said michel de montaigne "and the anserts is..... uhhh its my destiny or some thing like that. i just realized it. i mean my name is MONTAINE witch DOES sound SUSPICOUSLY SIMILER to MOUNTAIN if your high enough. so i guess THIS IS MY DESTONY"

"cool" said elsa "annnd then what the fuck will we do?? i mean if you had secrets like that then i guess u have OTHER secrets, that have to do with 'how the hell do we deal with dath vader'???"

"indeed" said michel de montaigne "just over the mountains is a ancient holy temple of some magic dudes that could destroy EVERYTNING with some weird magic i dont really understand. lets go to see them and axe them to kill darh vader??"

"sounds like a good idea" said elsa "but first MORE SEX"  
"no" said anna "first MORE PAN CAKES WITCH IS MORE PAN CAKES THAN NOTNINg"  
"no" said michel de montaigne "because elfs dont smoke weed and get high as fuck i need to get my WEED ON if you know what im saying you know i havent smoked for like fucking eternities??"

and then they made sex weed pan cakes as a compromise and then left to the stuff that michel de montaigne mentioned.

\---

"so" axed gunilla when she and HEDWING POTTER were walking in hogworts "theres just one small thing that would be p good to plan out. uhh how the hell do we kill voderdmort??"

"good question" said hedwing potter "and there fore its exposition time. uuhh you probably havent heard this but its a long ass story so im just gonna give the fucking important facts. LORD VOLDERMOT some how become like IMMORTAL as in CANNTO FUCKING DIE. i have tried. he lets me knife him every time i visit the prison (i think dudes getting off from it jesus crits thats fucking creepy) and he just DOESNT DIE. so there fore the logicel explanation is that he CANNOT FUCKING DIE, so i searched in google 'how to become immortel like the thing where u cannto die'. and guess what i found??? theres this thing called a HORECRUZ that basically does some magic to make u die"

"ok" said gunilla "so we find this 'HOECRUXC' and then dedstroy it witch probably kills lord vodlerrot?"  
"sounds good" said hedwing potter "but theres just 1 problem. YOU CANNOT FUCKING DESTROY HOECRUZES. its imposible."  
"what" axed gunilla "how the hell is that even a thing. cant u like throw it into a fucking volcatno???"  
"yeah kind of" said heding "but really not at all. theres just one sacred temple where some angry spirits that supposedly can DESTROY ANYTHING live. and there fore we can just take your royal sexcopter there after we find the thing and maybe it works then"

they came across a sing that said "LORD VOLDERORTS HORECRZU STORAGE. DONT FUCKING ENTER."

"uhhhh thats p stupid for security reasons" said gunilla.  
"not really" commented hedwing potter. "no body even fucking knows whats the fuck is a hoecruz. i had to go to the SECOND PAGE OF GOOGLE, what the FUCK, at that point most people just GIVE THE FUCK UP."  
"wow" said gunilla.

and then they went to the LORD VODEMORTS HORECRUXC STORAGE. it was a DARK AS FUCK PLACE that had some kind of CREEPY FUCKING STATUES of all kinds of CREEPY CREATURES GETTINGG KNIFED INTO THEIR FACES.

"fuck" gunilla whipsered "theres a FUCKING GIANT SNAKE THERE!!!"

and indeed there was a FUCKING GIANT SNAKE THERE. it was GIGANTIC AS FUCK (mass almost 70000 kg) and also LONG AS FUCK (length almost 40m) witch is P FUCKING MUNCH if you dont know shit about measirements.

"OH FUCK" said hedwing potter "THATS A BESILISK!!! if we look it into the eyes then we will FUCKING DIE. holy shits thats some bad shit."

"i dont care" said gunilla badassly. the snake hissed, u know the sound snakes makes thats kind of like SSSSSSSSS hence the fucking verb is called "hiss" and not something like "bgyuola".

GUNILLA HEROICALLY AND BADASSLY RIPPED HER TOP OFF and showned her boobes and then the SNAKE BESILISK FUCKING DIED OF SEXINESS.

"now lets go" gunilla said badassly "becaus we have a FUCKING HOECRUZ TO STEAL"

NEXT CHAPTER: WHAT IS LORD VOLDEROTS HORECRUZ???? WHERE DO ELSANNA AND MICHEL DE MONTAIGNE GO??? HOW DOES THE BATTLE OF BAT MAND AND DARH VADER END??? AND WHAT I S HAPPENING IN ARDELIA???


	8. CHAPTER 8: THE FIRST BABY WAR BEGINGS

CHAPTER 8: THE FIRST BABY WAR BEGINGS

"HOLY SHIT" screamed bat man when he saw the THOMAS "HELLSATIN" THE NUCLEAR TANK ENGINE APOCALYPSE TRAIN, because THOMAS "HELL SATAN" THE NUCLEAR TANK ENGLINE APOLCAPYSE TRAIN was a PRETTY FUCKING SCAREY THING. it was a train made of BLOOD and DEAD BABIES and also SKELITINS and PURE EXISTENTIAL DREAD. it had a skull face w smaller skuls in the eyes of the skull and they all were BLEEDING BLEED from their eyes. and it was a fast train and went FAST AS HELL (speed almost 300000000 m/s).

"PREPARE.... TO.... BE SENT TO THE HELL... IN2 WHITCH YOU BELONG, SINNER..... IT HAS... BECOME TIME TO REAP THE SOULS OF THOSE WHO ARE DOOMED TO SERVE IN ETERNAL AGONY... TO THE GREAT MASTER OF ALL.. WHOSE DARK EYE WATCHES OVER THE UNIVESRE.... AND WHOSE SEEDS POISON THE LAND AND SHALL MAKE ALL WITHER..... WHO COULD WITH A SINGLE MOVE BREAK APART REALITY ITSELF... BUT DOES NOT, FOR THE MAXIMUM SUFFERING IS REACHED ONLY BY THE LENGHTNING OF MORTAL TORTURE.... YES THE MASTER I SERVE.... CUTHLY" scramed TOMAS "HELL SATAN" THE NUCLEAR TANK ENGINE APOCALYPSE TRAIN from ALL thes kulls in his body, witch were quite a few of skulls since THOMAS "HELLSTATAN" THE NUCLEAR TANK ENGINE APOCALYPSE TRAIN was made of skelitins.

"shit" shitted bat man. he was only preapred to beat up some crazy old men and wo men who dresed in fun costumeds and comitted crimes w a specific theme. and not THOMAS "HELLSATAN" THE NUCLEAR TANK ENGINE APLPCASYPE TRAIN.

"kill him, my mechanical son" commanded DARH VADER and laughed evilly. dr cap jack sparow also laughned evilly, because he was the one to build the god damn THOMAS "HELLSATAN" THE NUCLEAR TANK ENGINE APOCALYPSE TTAIN IN THE frist place.

"YES....." scemed THOMAS "HELLSATAN" THE NUCLEAR TANK ENGINE APLOCAPSYSE TRAIN. "THE BLOOD SHALL FLOW.... THE SINNERS SHALL KNOW PAIN UNLIKE ANY OTHER.... THE INETAVIBILITY OF DEATH SHALL RAIN UPON THEM....."

and then THOMAS "HELLSTAAN " THE NUCLEAR TANK ENGINE APOCALYPSE TTAIN FIRED A FUCKING LAEZER BEAM!!! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSSSHHHHHH said the lazer beam expect it didnt really because lasers cant god dman talk. but there was noise anyways, and like WHAT EVER this is fucking fiction. i can use verbs that sound "cooler" and stuff like that, EVEN IF the meaning is LITERALLY not LITERALLY the SAME THING AS THE VERY THING WITCH IM DECRIBING. srsly if this bothers u one bit just try opening a fucking book some time, even shakespear does this shit.

buut anyways i think the point here is, that bat man dodged the laser beam.

"HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE???? F*UUCKCK???" scramed DARH VADER because tbf it IS kind of fucking bull shit. i get it bat man your the got damn bat man but STILL??? this fucking story loses all "stakeds" and "meanings" and shit if u can NOT be fucking kiled by THOMAS "HELLSATAN" THE NUCLEAR TANK ENGINE APOCALYPSE TRAIN witch even serves CUTHLY itself, who kind of souds like the BABY EATING DEMON, witch is the fucking main villain of this fucking whole trilegy???

SO MAYBE afetr bat man dodges the laser beam the THOMAS "HELLSATAN" THE NUCLEAR TANK ENGINE APOCALYSPE TRAIN begins to fire another laser but THIS TIME bat man is exhasted since dodgin g a fucking LASER BEAM THAT GOES WITH P MUCH FUCKING INFINITE SPEED must take lots of energies.

"FINE, WHAT EVER FINE ANOTHER LASER MY MECHANICAL SON" commanded darh vader.

"VERY WELL...." scaremd THOMAS "HELLSATAN" THE NUCLEAR TAN KENGINE APOCALYPSE TRAIN. "THOUGH YOU MAY MOMENTARILY CLAIM VICTORY.... IN THE END, MY MASTER SHALL PREVAIL... FOR HE IS SUFFERING ITSELF, FOR HE IS DEATH ITSELF... AND THE GREAT GOD SHALL DEVOUL ALL MEN WHO ARE MORTAL.... AND ALL BABIES THAT ARE BIRTHED FROM THEM.... SUCH IS MY MASTER CUTHLY.... TO LOOK INTO HIS EYES IS TO PEER INTO THE ABSTRACT IDEA OF PAIN ITSELF.... AND VIEW THE COUNTLESS SUFFERING THAT ALL SINNERS HAVE TO DATE SUFFERED.... AND ALL THE FUTURE PUNISHMENTS WITCH SHALL BE ETERANL... AND INFINITELY PAINFUL...."

"but yo forgot that trains have 1 WEAKNES" said bat man.  
"realy whats it" axed dr cap jack sparrow. uhhh dr cap jack sparrow you FUCKING BUILT A TARAIN... im not buying that bat man some how has BETTER TRAIN INFORMATION. i mean of course maybe theres a train criminal in gottham, who u know like ties old ladies to the train tracks and forces bat man to choose whether to change where thhe train goes, and then batm an does bat man things and saves the all ladies. but anyways STILL what the hell is evne going on this stroy???

"the train" said bat man "is ALWAYS LATE"

and then he ran away screamind "MY PARENTS ARE DEAAAAAAAAAAAADD!!!"

then a wonan voice said over the DARH VADERTS DEATHQUARTERS ANNOUNCEMENT SYSTEM: "the THOMAS "HELLSATAN" THE NUCLEAR TANK ENGINE APOCALYPSE TRAIN to ardelia has been dealyed. the expected time of departure is 18:49 witch is after 6 hrs if your 2 stutid to even read a fucking clock."

"hes right" sighned dr cap jack sparrow.

"it doestn matter" siad DARH VADER and kissed dr cap jack sparrow. "i mean if THIS wondrful train was what u found in the weaponry basement then we SHALL WIN ANYWAYS!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! anyways do we have any other wepons?"

"theres an army of dead baby robobts in the basement" said dr cap jack sparrow "remember, those who some dude called DUMLEDORE made 4 us if we agreed to give him enough momey to organise some stutid revolution some where"

"ah, now i remember" said DARH VADER "it was kind of strange how he knew how to make a dead baby army out of the citiczens of this country even with out knowing how he learned that skill. i mean thats a P FUCKING SPECIFIC magic to know."

"i think theres no rationel expalantion" said dr cap jack sparrow "u knwo thats how the magic usually goes"

DARH VADER agtreed because the fuckin dumbass dident even read my fic THE BABIES ARE US where it was fucking explained that dumledore made the elsannabot army and could there fore probably also do some other armies from dead star land civilians. but anyways then some thing HAPENED!!!

AND THEN THE THING THAT WAS HAPPENED WAS THAT....

 

... DARH VADER BEGAN TO GIVE BIRBTH!!

\---

mean while in the voldemorts horcruz storage in hogworts gunilla and hedwing potter had alrady defeated more boring enemies, like my mom who gets angry if u look at hott elsanna pix and some lesser demons like a gigant spider and a dog w 3 heasds.

then there was a sign that said "HERE IS WHERE LORD VOLDEROTS HOECRUX IS. PLS DONT FUCKING ENTER UNLESSS YOU DONT KNOW WHAT A HORECRUZ IS AND R HERE ONLY TO CLEAN OR SOME TSHIT LIKE THAT, BUT AFTER U R DONE CLEANING PLS MAKE SURE TO kILL YOUR SELF TO NOT LEARN WHAT HOERCURZES ARE."

"i have HUGE BOOBES (radius almost 1.7m) so there fore FUCK THE LAW and especiylay sings that arent even laws. i mean srsly every body can write a god damn sing so HOW THE FUCK are sings even laws if their not made by the fucking governent and OFFICALLY AND BURAUCRATICALLY APPROVED. and considering LORD VODLEROMT has been the ruler for like 2 hrs id be P FUCKING SURPRESED if he has managed to pass any laws."

"but uuhhhh how could he even builbt this room??" axed HEDWING POTTER. "i mean im just a baby who dosent know any thing but tbf i do seem to know a whole fucking many of things so.... this dungeon set up is p elaborate and im having a hard time believing he would even manage to set this up???"

"that is certaniy true" wondered gunilla "i wonder if there sa rationel explantion 4 dis?? wait, no, i dont have time 2 wonder because LETS FUCKING STEAL THIS HORECRIUZ??? AND NOT STAND HERE DOING STUPID THINS??"

"speak 4 urself" angered hedwing potter "u just spent like 30 secs ranting about why signs arent the law"  
"AND YOU spent at leas t 20 secs ranting about how 2 hrs is 2 short time to make eleborate dungeon set ups that have GIGANT MONTESR and WEIRD WOMEN WHO ARE MAD AT PPL WHO LOOK AT PIX OF QUEEN LESBIEN INCETS and MAGIC ITEMS THAT M AKE U UNABLE TO DIE?? so what the fuck IM NOT THE WORST RANTER HERE"

but then an evil laugh LAUGHED EVILLY!!! gunilla and hedwing potter gasped and turned around and saw LORD VOLDERMT??!!!

"r u finished with ur rants yet??" he laugnhed evilly "because, yuong hedwing potter i can tell u why 2 hrs is enoug time to construct this eloberate set up dungeon full of scary monsters and women who hate their childs and dont understand anything, MOM"

"ok pls tell" angered HARRY POTTER "or i will FUCKING kill you, and maybe even do it anyways"

"ok" said lor dvoldemort "the ansert is simple and its NO. 2 hrs is NOT enough to construct an elobaret dungeon full of monsters, secret sex dungeons AND moms who should FUCKING STOP LOOKING AT MY COMPTER SCREEN IF YOUR GONNA COMPLAIN WHEN U SEE ELSANNA PIX, MOM"

"but... but... HOW IS THAT POSIBLE?" scramed harry potter

"the SECOND ansertws is that.... HARRY POTTER NEVER INTENDED FOR YOU TO BECOME THE KING OF WIZARDLAND!!!! AHHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHHAHAHJAAHHAHAHAHAJJAHA!!!! IT WAS ME THE WHOLE TIME!!!! HHAHSHAHSSHAHAHHAHAAHHAHAHAHHAJAJHHA!!!!!!!!!!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THATS IMPSOBLE" scarmed hedwing potter.

"search 4 ur feelings, and youll find if a fucking FACT bro" laughned voldemort evilly "i mean got any other expalantions?? who else could have built this VOLDEMOTS HORECRUXZ HOLDING TRAP (AND SCRELY KNIFING SEX DUNGEON) DUNGEON??? let me tell u that URLL WONT FIND ANY RATIONEL EXPLANATION WHAT SO EVER!!! EXPECT THE ONE I JUST TOLD YOU!!!!"

"SHIT UP" hedwing potter angered "BECAUS, I DONT LIKE THE VERSION OF REALITY WITCH YOU ARE PRESENTING WITH YOUR WORDS, I WILL, FUCKING KILL YOU!! GUNILLA!!! TAKE THE HOECRUZ AND RUN IN2 THE ROYAL SEX COPTER!!!"

"looks like she alredy did that???" axed volemert rethorically. and it was p much true, or then there was another explantion 4 why 1rt) gunilla was gone 3st) and the horezurx was also gone.

but anyways then they FUCKING DUELED!!!

\---

"r we there yet" complained anna when they had dseceneded the magic baby mountaind and were now in a boring desert FUL OF SAND.

"soon, since we came as fast as they could" thought michel de montaigne, who was also legolas. "it should be some where around here.... this country was destroyed by a nuclear blast in the past, but the only thing that survived was this temple of the sacred gods who can deestroy ANY THING."

"how does it even wrok" wondered elsa "i mean LIETERALLY ANY THING is a p fucking large concept. since being a sceince is my thing im not gonna acxept any half assed explanation that is literally "MAGIC""

"and why?" axed michel de montaigne the legolas impersonator "i mean lets look at the fucking facts that are happened here. 1rd) u fucking GIVE BIRTH to each other and THATS FUCKING MAGIC, because al though im not a genecticist that shit sounds SHADY AS HELL seicne wise. 2rd) you can fucking use spells 3st) then you alslo give birth to nuclaer weapons... so.... uhhh all of this shit is p much just MAGIC."

"fine" shugred elsa "but this birthing magic shit HAS 2 have a rationel expalantion"

"maybe we can reasearch it later after we defeath DARH VADER" sugested michel de montaigne "after all uhhh excuse me im the fucking BABY PROPHET... so baby magic is kind of fucking MY DEAL."

"HOLY SHIT WHATS THAT IN THE DISTANC???" scremaed anna suddenly

"is it incets??" axed elsa.  
"is it weed??" axed michel de montainge.  
"is itp an cakes???" axed anna.  
"is it bat man??" axed anna againgn after getting what the refrance was. but uhhh 1rd) its not fucking bat man, think agaign 2rd) THE REFRANCE DOESNT EVEN INVOLVE BAT MAN, BECAUSE HE DOESNT FUCKING FLY, UNLIKE SUPER MAN. tbh when u think of it "BAT"man soulds EXCACTLY like some body who should know how to fly, since uhh hes a bat???? and "SUPER"man uhhh what does "SUPER" have 2 do with flying??? the ppl in comic books are either fucking idiots who dont know that bats fly better than supers or then they just read teh news and one day theres an article that says "BREAKNIG NEWS: BAT MAN CANT FLY, EVEN THO HES A FUCKING BAT, SO WHAT T HE HELL?????"

but the point is that it was ARDELIAS ROYAL SEXCOPTER. gunilla landed with teh ARDELIAS ROYAL SEXCOPTER and stepped out.

"sup biptches" said gunilla "im here 2 meet the HYDRAYLIC PRESS CHANNEL gods"

"not possible" said michel de montaigne "because the gods can only destroy 1 thing evry 3 yers"

"well then" said gunilla and took out a pistol "LETS FUCKING FIGHT ABOUT IT"

\---

DARH VADER and dr cap jack sparrow and the army of dead star land citizen soldiers all stepped into the THOMAS "HELLSATAN" NUCLEAR TANK ENGINE ALOCAPLYSE TRAIN who was tbh actualy p conformtable insine. witch is a good thing becaus trains are usually meant 2 CARRY PPL AND CARGO??? and like being CONSTANYLT ON FIRE sounds fucking stypid if thats what u want to do.

"NEXT STOP ARDELIA" commanded DARH VADER and then the train descned into a train tunnel witch was 4 trains that went 2 ardelia from under the ocean.

meanwhile ROBIN WHO NOBODY HAD NOTICED BECAUSE ROBINS A BORING CHARACTER had sneaked in2 the THOMAS "HELLSATAN" NUCLEAR TANK ENGINE ALOCPALYSE TRAIN. he had to stop it, because he fights crime and riding a demon train in2 another country IS P MUCH THE MOST ILLEGALEST THING IN THE UNVIESRSE??? SRSLY JUST TRY 2 DO THAT IN REAL LIFE AND YOUR FUCKING GOING TO THE SLAMMER

DARH VDER decided to laugh evilly. "HHAHAHAHAHAH!!! WITH MY TWO BABIES, I SHALL NOW DEFEAT EVERYBODY...... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAAH!!! THE FIRST BABY WARS HAS BEGUN!!!!!"

NEXT CHAPTER: THE FIRST BABY WAR! GUNILLA GIVES BIRTH!! WHATS THE DEAL WITH THE HYDRAULIC PRESS CHANNEL??? WHO WINS, HEDWING POTTER OR LORD VOLDEMORT?? WHO ARE DARH VADERS BABYS?? WHATS WAS GOING ON IN ARDELIA WHILE OTHER CHARACTERS DICKED AROUND THE WORLD?? AND WHO SHALL RULE ARDELIA??? AND WHATS THE DEAL WITH ELSANNA GOD OF FERTILITY THRETENING TO DESTROY THE WORLD AND BIRTH IT ANEW????


End file.
